Hide and Seek
by sprezzatura
Summary: The Borgias SHOWTIME fic. Cesare/Lucrezia. As Lucrezia visits Rome after spending time with her husband, Alfonso, complications erupt between the family and the blood bonds will never be the same. WARNING! Incest ahead.
1. The Setting Sun

The fair Lucrezia Borgia leaned on her balcony rail, waiting. She was searching the horizon for Alfonso. Days ago, she would have been combing the distance for her brother Juan, but she had concluded he was off, away from home. Now, she leapt in place as she thought of her dear husband. The wind whipped her hair past her pearly neck, and she breathed in the scent of Rome. The air seemed to freshen her very skin within moments.

Two hands grasped her waist, and she was about to scream, but one of the hands left her waist to cup over her mouth. Her heart was thudding in her chest, and she slowly turned around to come face to face with none other than her favorite brother, Cesare, who was slightly amused. His hand left her mouth to cradle her neck and he sheepishly apologized for scaring her. "How were you able to enter? My chambers were locked, brother." Lucrezia breathed. A mischievous glint appeared in his eyes. "I have my ways, dearest." Lucrezia's eyes widened. "You would be smart not to do so again." she warned. At that, he let out a loud laugh and swiftly kissed her forehead. Lucrezia chuckled and turned around, to where she was facing out onto her balcony. She leaned into her brother's strong frame, resting her arms on his hands, which once again formed a vice around her waist. He pressed his face into the back of her head, and quietly hummed a lullaby as the two stared out into the setting sun.

Giving her hair a final kiss, he bent down to her delicate ear. "The evening meal is ready. Come eat with me." his breath tickled her ear, and she giggled out of control, squirming out of his grasp and darting back into her room. Grinning wickedly, Cesare stepped in after her, and closed the balcony doors. All around him, darkness came. Not a single candle was lit. It was him, and Lucrezia, in a dangerous game of hide and seek.

Cesare held his breath, like a predator trying to detect it's prey. He heard faint huffs of excited breaths... under the sheets. Silently making his way to the edge of Lucrezia's bed, he felt his way with his fingers to where he waited in complete darkness. Waiting. Waiting...

Lucrezia felt a slight itch on her ankle. That devil-sent itch! Slowly reaching her hand down to her foot, her fingers were just on the edge of the disturbance...

Cesare pounced.

(Author's note: This is based on SHOWTIME's Tv series The Borgias)


	2. The Fallen Chalice

Downstairs, the Borgia family were assembled around a grand oak table in the dining hall. The wood was covered with fresh fruits, seasoned meats, and tediously countless deserts. Nothing less was expected for the dinner of Pope Alexander. A young girl, probably Joffre's age, was in the corner of the room, leaning up against the smooth cobblestone wall to tune her violin. Servants rushed in and out, filling the glasses with wine when they grew empty. It was a cheerful moment. His Holiness was seated at the furthermost end of the long table, in a great chair of red satin. Joffre was to his left, next to his wife Sancia, laughing and grinning at the jokes passed around the banquet. And none other than Giulia Farnese, the shining ruby of His Holiness, was seated next to the Pope, winking and kissing Rodrigo Borgia's fingers.

"...And I told him, my dear boy," Rodrigo laughed, leaning to ruffle Joffre's dark brown curls, "to bring me the fattest cow in all of Italy, that we could feast upon in pleasure. I did not think he would bring his wife!" Laughs echoed out all throughout the grand hall as the wine glasses were refilled.

At the same time, upstairs in Lucrezia's loft, a shadow swept over her. Screeching giddily, she kicked and thrashed to free herself. Dark chuckles rang out and a strangely soft hand covered her mouth. Lucrezia breathed heavily as her heart pounded in her chest. Cesare moved his hand to let her breathe. "Must you run away again from me? Or can we join them downstairs?" He pretended to sound annoyed, and Lucrezia flicked him with her index finger. "I'm not hungry, brother." She said, and tried to stand up, breaking her brother's grip on her shin. Hurriedly, she opened the curtains of her balcony again, letting light flood the room. Cesare strode over to her and bent his head so that he stared directly down at her. This was one of the many times he enjoyed taking advantage of their height difference. His dark, almost black eyes looked into hers, and he had a smirk on his face. Lucrezia stood defiantly up against him, staring back, blue scorching black. "Don't make me force you, Lucrezia," he warned, ever so slowly moving his face downwards to rest his forehead against hers. "I'm starving. I just might have to eat you if you keep me here." He grinned as Lucrezia inhaled sharply. Her eyes had somehow shut somewhere between him resting his forehead on her, and the intoxicating scent of his leather clothes. He was everywhere, clouding her mind. "Don't..." Lucrezia started, hearing her voice wobble for an unknown reason. "Don't be so silly. You aren't that evil." She mumbled softly. Cesare froze, entranced for a slight moment.

He moved his hand to stroke her neck, the soft skin feeling angelic under his fingers. Then, he swiftly picked her up bridal-style, as if she weighed nothing. Her eyes fluttered open and she giggled in protest. "No, brother! Stop, this is embarrasing." She groaned and Cesare simply walked out of her room, carrying her gently despite her moving. "Be quiet, sis. You'll be more embarrassed if the entire hall were to see you crying like a little baby." He sighed, watching her frown at his comment. "I am not a baby! You're just a muddy dog." she pouted. Cesare narrowed his eyes at her and lifted her to his chest so that he once again towered over her face. "A muddy dog?" He faked hurt. Lucrezia wasn't moved, and she raised her eyebrows. Cesare gazed at her mischievously, and chuckled deeply, turning his eyes back to the hall in front of them. Lucrezia sighed as he carried her, staring up at him. She suddenly turned her head and kissed his bicep. Cesare glanced down at her, tightening his grip on her thighs. "You're not a muddy dog. I suppose I was acting childish." she murmured, leaving her lips on his warm skin. Her brother half-smiled and kissed her hair as the two walked into the dining hall.

He set her down as they made their ever occuring entrance. Cesare, always with Lucrezia. Lucrezia, always with Cesare. It was nothing new for the family. His Holiness spotted them at the dining hall's door, and beckoned them in. There was lively music playing and many people danced around the great room. Lucrezia, checking her appearance, smoothed out her ruffled teal dress and fixed her hair swiftly, paying no mind to Cesare sighing at her. "You don't need to worry about your appearance, sis," he murmured in her ear as he led her into the hall. "..you're always striking." He winked at her and she tried to not smile at her brother's charms. She linked her arm with his and they walked to the banquet. Lucrezia turned to Cesare and smiled fleetly, before running to kiss His Holiness' cheek as Cesare took his seat. "There she is!" Rodrigo smiled as his daughter ran to him. Giulia beckoned her over to kiss her forehead. "Now that you are here, we can finally start the actual feast." she laughed. Lucrezia smiled happily, and then turned back to Cesare. He already had a glass full of wine and he was drinking it as she came up to sit by him. She knew how Cesare could easily become intoxicated. "Cesare, don't drink too much tonight, promise me?" She stroked his hand as he set his chalice down to protest. "Sister, it's a party. Pray tell me when the last time you actually had fun was." His eyes burned into hers, and she gazed back. Defiantly, he lifted his chalice to her lips. Not taking her eyes off him, Lucrezia drained the goblet. Cesare felt a shock of sudden arousal, and he dropped the cup to the floor as his mind forgot to hold onto it. It clattered loudly and drew the attention of several visitors, but they simply forgot in a moment's time. Lucrezia jumped at the loud noise and covered her mouth with her hand as she saw the mess on the floor. Servants quickly moved to clean the spilled wine. Cesare stared blankly at a fork on the table, trying not to blink, trying not to envision Lucrezia again moments before. The others at the table heard the goblet drop and Rodrigo frowned as he saw Cesare's catatonia. Lucrezia noticed too, and touched his arm. He was still. "Cesare? Brother, tell me what is wrong." She said, turning her full attention on him. He simply stared at the table, feeling agitated and aroused at once. Lucrezia groaned softly and touched his chin to turn his gaze on her. Cesare had no control, she was the one with the power. And there she was, when he finally looked at her again, differently this time. That face. That body. Lucrezia tried stroking his cheek to make him talk to her, becoming even more concerned with each passing second. "I need to leave, sis." Cesare finally said, watching Lucrezia frown slightly. He stood, feeling pressure and heat in his entire body. He felt feverish, almost burning as he stepped out into the empty hallway that was dimly lit with candles. He decided to take off a layer of his leather apparel, his vest. He pressed his back to the cool stone wall and sat on a bench nearby. There was a stained glass painting of a dove at the eastern wall, lit by the moon. He looked at the beautiful colors and details, trying to take his mind off of Lucrezia. It was in vain, though, because she walked into the hall alone and worrying. She finally saw him and ran to him, kneeling by the bench. Cesare stared at her in defeat. "Cesare..." she tried to ask him why he was acting the way he was, but she was cut off. For his hands slid around her body and in her hair, behind her neck, and his mouth met hers in a milisecond. He couldn't think, he couldn't do anything but love her at that moment, when he finally realized the truth of his feelings. Lucrezia felt a shockwave pass through her as their lips met, and she couldn't grasp reality. She froze like ice as her brother's carresses slowed and his mouth lost all force, trailing kisses on her neck as he tried to catch his breath. "...Lucrezia," he breathed, "Sis, forgive me. I have sinned against you." He felt burning tears form in his eyes, but they never fell. They blinded and clouded his vision and he could not face her. He would not. Lucrezia felt dazed, almost faint as she felt her brother panting on her shoulder. She tried to still herself from shaking, and she braced her body on the bench. "..Goodnight, brother." she said, trying to flee from the scene. Her legs shook as she ran from him, feeling her chest convulse as tears flooded her face and sobs wrecked her body. She couldn't find words to describe the emotions she felt. She stumbled and tripped on the stairs on her way up the long hall.

Cesare was on his hands and knees on the floor. He couldn't breathe, couldn't think of anything to fix the mess he made. He stood, wiping tears from his eyes, and put his vest back on. He checked the sides of his hips for his weapon sheaths. Still there, each holding a sharp dagger. He had decided on a whim, in the spur of the confusion, to leave the girl he loved. He felt numb, and he was grateful for that. He couldn't ride in the dark with the feeling of his chest being torn apart. Making his way out the kitchen's back door, the servants moved out of his path in fear of how dangerous he looked at me moment. He was finally outside, with the Italian gusts drying the tears on his face, blowing through his hair. He sprinted down a dirt path from the Vatican. He flew past the markets and spotted a bay horse tied to a post near one of the shops. The marketplace was empty, so he decided to take it. It had no saddle, but it didn't matter to him. He swung himself up onto the steed, trying to calm it by stroking its mane and gathering the reins of its ragged bridle. He kicked its belly, sending it into a rear and making it charge forward. Years of horseriding trained him to stay seated as the beast moved with incredible speed. He flew past the gates of Rome, trying to not look back even though it felt as if a chain was stuck in his heart, harnessing him to Lucrezia. It had always been like that, only not so devastating as it was now. The horse bellowed and snorted as it galloped past the buildings outside of the city he had always known as his home. It was only until he was miles away that the full impact of his decision overtook him. He crumpled against the horse's neck and the beast slowed, out of breath. _Lucrezia, Lucrezia, Lucrezia. _Cesare fell from the animal, hitting a sharp rock with his head as the world spun and his heart screamed in anguish. He watched the stars as everything faded to black.


	3. Heaven and Hell

Lucrezia, still dazed by her brother's advances, raced up the steps and down the hall. It was just too much. It was her fault, all hers. She felt grief tear through her just then, as she did when she heard of his departure. She had always been saddened when he had to leave her, but at the news of his midnight fall on a ruggish road leading out of Rome, she couldn't compare her pain and worry. For as dawn broke the next morning, and Giulia Farnese ran to the girl's room to tell her, Lucrezia knew that she loved him. She was in love with him. Her heart sheltered a secret passion for him that she was always aware of, she had just not felt its full potential.

As the words slipped out of Giulia's colorless lips, Lucrezia felt violently determined to go to him. "You must let me go!" she pleaded, getting out of her bed still dressed in a tear-stained nightgown. Giulia tried to protest, saying she didn't want to see her in more pain. Lucrezia didn't bother listening. He was in the medicinal chambers, laying on a stiff bed with bandages on his head. His beautiful eyes were closed as Lucrezia ran to him, the startled words of the nurses a faint murmur in the back of her head. "He is my brother..." she faintly spoke, as she placed her hands on his face. She traced his mouth, cheeks, eyelids, brow, anything to comfort her that he was with her again, in her arms.

The nurses nodded in recognition, but one stepped forward to place her hand on Lucrezia's shoulder. "If you could wait outdoors, we are not done with him. His outcome looks well, but even a cardinal needs prayers, My Lady." The nurse's voice was understanding and kind, but Lucrezia felt her heart was attached to him at that moment, and when she was escorted out of the room, it was no different from being ripped apart. As the doors closed and the nurses and doctor gathered around him, Lucrezia stayed frozen outside the chambers. She placed a hand on the wooden door and pressed her forehead to it, waiting.

Vanozza, Joffre, Giulia, and the others arrived soon after. Their faces were all the same. Grief-stricken and worried. Juan did not come. Lucrezia knew he would not, since he was away from Rome at that time leading the Papal armies. She ran into her mother's arms and fresh tears took her then. They streamed down her face as Vanozza stroked her daughter's golden hair. She knew how Lucrezia loved Cesare. It was not uncommon to understand their connection. As she tried to soothe her anguished child, Joffre laid a light hand on his sister's back. Lucrezia turned and embraced him, recieving his kiss on her cheek with a half-hearted smile. "He will be fine." Joffre told her, his voice reminding her of how childish he still was, even in that serious time. Lucrezia said nothing, but touched his cheek and left to sit on a bench next to the great wooden door.

Vanozza watched her daughter in her grief, knowing there was nothing to console her at that moment, unless Cesare burst through the doors to sweep her off her feet. It was hours later that the door finally swung open, revealing a weary but determined doctor. Vanozza stepped towards him first, while Lucrezia stared in shock of what she might hear. "Is he...?" Vanozza inquired, trying to ask if he was alright, but the words stuck to the back of her throat. The doctor nodded, clearing his throat to announce about Cesare. "The young man is doing well. He developed a concussion and perhaps a slight fracture on his skull. He does have some amnesia, so try your best to..." He eyed Lucrezia warily at that moment, "...work with it." He concluded, watching Lucrezia rise from her seat.

"Does he not remember me?" she faintly said, voice trembling. The doctor frowned. "It is not as bad as the cases I have seen, but if you want to be with him, he is now sleeping in the recovery room down the hall and to the right. I must take my leave now, but any questions you have will be answered by the nurses." He said, dipping his head curtly and exiting from their view. The group was stricken indeed, but hope and relief flooded through them. Lucrezia felt her body sway to the direction the doctor said he would be in, and Vanozza nodded, turning to the others. "She is the most desperate at this time, it would be best for only her to visit him now." She said in a grim voice, and frowned at Joffre's pout. "I'm sure he would love to see you, but not in a huge group at one time, my darling." Vanozza kissed his hair and gave Lucrezia one last look before heading back down the hall.

Lucrezia had never moved so fast in her life. Her legs darted beneath her and carried her to the room he was in, trying to calm her breath before turning the handle to enter. She stepped into a dreary room, curtains barely open, an unmistakably uncomfortable bed in the center with a dark figure laid in it. She moved towards him, softly kneeling beside his sleeping frame to gaze at his face as she did before. Touching his cheek, she felt warmth fill her then, and she raised herself to kiss his face. Reveling in his scent that she always knew as Cesare, she scattered kisses on his forehead and his cheeks. His slight intake of breaths and exhales were the most beautiful sounds at that moment.

"Dearest Cesare..." she murmured, tears of happiness filling her eyes, "...you must not leave me. I would die." She placed another kiss on his brow. "I would. You would take me with you. Because I love you." She sighed against his skin, cradling his upper torso with her arms. She felt him stir then, waking with a confused face and a frown, but once he saw her, he smiled. Lucrezia felt nothing could have held her back once he gave her that heaven sent smile. He remembered her. Her mouth found his, and her lips molded to him. Even if her passion was forged in hell, it felt like heaven.


End file.
